I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

The only normal people you know are the ones you don't know very well.

When life gets tough, remember: You were the strongest sperm.

Remember, there are two words in life that will open a lot of doors for you. Push and Pull.

That Amazing Moment.. When YOu DrOp YOur PhOne.. But, The HeadphOnes Save Its Life.. ^_-

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

When I joke they take it seriously. When I am serious they take it as a joke..

That 'Awesome moment', when you see someone's status,and you know it's aimed at you :-)

Eight letters, three words, one regret. I miss you.

I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday.

Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.

Its awesome .. when some one understands u more than u..! :-)

When you're good, you're good, when you're awesome you're me.

The awesome feeling you get when people remember small details about you. :-)

I don't always lose my phone but when I do its always on silent.

That Awesome Moment, When You Find A Free WiFi In Public Places.. :-D

The best thing about a picture is that it never changes even when the people in it do.

Those who say money can't buy happiness are shopping at the wrong places.

I miss your smile but I miss my own even more.

The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.

I like crazy people, especially those who don't see the risk.

Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.

I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.

I'm jealous of my parents, i'll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

Best conversations always happen late in the night. :)

Honesty is the best gift you can give.

Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet (o_o) (>_<)

Money can't buy happiness, but it pays for internet, which is pretty much the same thing.

I still miss him, I miss him, I'm missing him.

The funniest thing in class is when the teacher cracks a joke and no one laughs.

The only reason god made cousins so that parents can compare our marks.

Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.

The annoying moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you're watching.

I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged.

The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.

Before talking; Please connect the tongue to the brain!

Life is a mirror and will reflect back to the thinker what he thinks into it.

I don't want to earn my living, I want to live.

Dear iPhone, Please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shit.